The BVI

We arrived safely in Tortola Sunday afternoon and we are having a great time. For some reason the camera is not uploading pictures into Steve's computer so unless I get that fixed you will just have to believe me when I say it is beautiful here. We will be diving tomorrow.

This is a perfect place to relax and unwind. We are very happy right now.

We're off tomorrow

"A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in. "
Author: Robert Orben

Not quite vacation yet as Steve has meetings Thursday and Friday in Fort Myers but then we are off to Tortola for ten days of rest and relaxation. We are staying in a different villa than we have in the past but hopefully it will be just as nice. Plans now include scuba diving several days and perhaps even some sailing. We are looking forward to Steve and Linda time, a change of scenery, and some peace and quiet. We both have reading but just watching the sun and surf will be fine with me. We are bringing the laptop and there are wi-fi hot spots but I am not sure how often we will be checking in so don't expect too much over the next two weeks. Maybe I'll just get some pictures up so everyone can enjoy our vacation with us.

Overdue update

This past week has slid by quickly. Lots of activities have kept me away from the computer and in anticipation of vacation I have been busy. Of course April 15th, tax day, has added some additional tasks. The days continue to be easier than the nights in the process of dealing with grief. I don't know why it is but when I wake up at 2 or 3 or 4 AM the reality of the fact that John will never be here again hits me the hardest. I think the fact that in the middle the night the feeling of being alone is the greatest too. It is the hardest time to divert your attention to another subject so consequently it becomes a downward struggle to even think about something else. I am trying lots of mental tricks that have been offered and so far some of them have helped a little. I am definitely looking forward to a change of scenery too. A little more sunshine will be helpful and hopefully when we return to Perrysburg there will be more nice weather than bad.


"The journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."

Lao Tzu

I saw this quote twice in the last 24 hours so I guess it was meant for me to ponder. Life is a journey and in order to continue along the path sometimes it has to be done one step at a time. I continue to put one foot in front of the other.

Some new AJ pictures

Here are some of the latest photos of AJ. We are anxiously awaiting some nicer weather to get outside of his bike. Next he is playing with Diego in his treehouse.Diego, is Dora's cartoon friend. We will have to learn all of the newest cartoon figures. And finally talking to Aunt Jessica on the phone.

Springtime in Ohio???

Okay I am just feeling a little humorous today. I should have posted these pictures on April Fools day. These were taken when Jessica was home for John's funeral. As a California girl she was able to enjoy the the Ohio snow despite the circumstances by spending a little time with her Dad cross country skiing out on the golf course. The pictures were still on the camera last week when I started taking some new pictures of AJ. I had forgotten all about them. I don't think Jessica or Steve even saw them.

And actually now the weather is finally begining to feel a little springlike. We saw the first golfers on the course yesterday and the trees and grass are showing more shades of green than brown. The significance of the Easter holiday and the natural rebirth of everything in the spring is definitely helping the mental spirits. Vacation is not far off and both Steve and I will be glad to get away together and continue our healing process.

Again we both are so grateful to all of our family and friends. This has proven to be a time when the words "thank you" in no way begin to express our feelings. I can only promise that we will pay it forward.

I am in a good mood today but as I was closing I looked at some of my quotes and saw this one. Perhaps you will understand a parents grief at losing a child a little more after reading it.

"Making the decision to have a child — it’s momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body."

An interesting quote

"There is no justice in the court of appeals"

Steve gave me this quote which he says was made by a judge on the State Court of Appeals. In that venue a judge is titled Judge (name) not Justice (name). I have been thinking about it today both literally and with a deeper meaning.

It was nice to have Steve home again. We had dinner together last night for the first time in a week and it was also the first time in awhile we could just sit and talk. Mike on second shift may have some advantages in that regard. We both talked about John and life in general and I again fell back on the fact that sometimes life is just so unfair. That is the story behind the quote today.

A musical link from a friend. Eric Clapton after his 4 year old son died.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRsJlAJvOSM

Music to my Ears

"After silence that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. "

Aldous Huxley



Next to reading quotes I think listening to music is the best therapy for everything. Music touches so many emotions. It can take you back to a moment in time... it transcends all time. I have been collecting songs that are special for my MP3 play list. I love Sarah Mclachlan and of course Josh Groban is special and I have cuts from Mercy Me. The Beatles..."Let it Be", ...James Taylor, "You've got a Friend".

But I am asking you all now to come up with something that is special to you. Something that has made an impact on your life. Something that when you hear it on the radio makes you smile. Something that has deeper meaning.

Janet gave me a CD after John died that was very special because it was recorded by the guest artist at her church's Christmas outreach program that we attended together in December. The CD titled Comfort has a number of great songs. This link is to a You Tube video of one of Kathy Troccoli's songs from the CD.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-aUoRT9Ml6I

Help me with music therapy and send me your selections.
Check out the other Kathy Troccoli with the Beach Boys. She has a great voice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUTEtHVP57Y

No April Fool!