Friends and family have all returned home, with the exception of Jessica who will be here until Sunday. I am finally running out of adrenaline and I have admitted to being tired. I will be able to rest today and I will allow sleep if it comes. But I need to begin to capture the events of the last few days before the details fade. There were too many absolutely precious moments that I want to remember, and other details that I don't want to forget.
The service for John was absolutely wonderful, if any funeral service could be described that way. I have asked both Marty and Annal to send me their eulogies so that I might print them here. Both young men brought John back to life for us through their stories and their final jointly written letter to AJ, left no doubt as to the quality of the friends John chose.
Last night was another long one with Jessica, Amanda, Marty, Annal and I, outlasting the others telling John stories. Will John stay connected? Ask Marty. As he was telling a particularly funny story about John the chair he was sitting on broke and Marty fell flat on his behind. We all laughed so hard and knew John was there telling us he was still around to defend himself.
I will be reading now about grieving and coping and already it has been interesting to see what little event might set off an emotional breakdown. I was prepared for the funeral yesterday. I knew it would be emotional. What I wasn't prepared for was being handed a program as we walked into St Rose and seeing John's full name, with the dates of his birth and death. The tears came so quickly. It was such a little thing but seeing those dates in print seemed so final.
Many of those I talked with over the past days have commented about the quotes I have chosen to print on this blog. I find them in different places but this one came to me from dear friend Michelle in an email response to my March 8th posting on this blog. It is so perfect.
"When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight." ~Kahlil Gibran
3 comments:
A most fitting quote - I loved the video and all the pictures that certainly testified to the delight John gave to so many.
We arrived home early this afternoon, and as we were driving, we relieved so many precious moments as well. We will cherish our time with you and are so appreciative of everything you did to make all of us feel so comforted, when it was we who wanted to comfort you!!
May you take some time to rest sweet friend.
I love you all dearly and will continue to walk with you!
What an appropriate quote Linda, and what a touching memorial yesterday was to the wonderful man we all knew as John Stanford. You could certainly feel the love and respect of all his friends, and feel for his relationship with AJ and Jesi. I wish you rest and comfort and special memories. Enjoy your time with Jessica and know how loved you are.
I know it is going to sound strange to say I had a wonderful time at John's Memorial Service but the truth is, I did have a wonderful time. Before the service I only knew John as a toddler; after the service I knew John as a man and oh what a man he was! I "saw" John through the eyes of a loving and very sad mother, through the eyes of a loving, stoic father, through the eyes of a sad younger brother, through the eyes of a very loving sister, through the eyes of a beautiful, caring wife and through the eyes of two incredible friends.
Bob and I were so glad to have made the long trip, feel honored to have shared his memorial service and rejoiced to have witnessed such a loving affirmation of this fine man, son, father, brother, husband and friend. I am here for you and the love and prayers will not stop.
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